The Echoes
An Echo · v1.00
THE HOUSE OF ZAN — Zan
My mother would always tell me when I was younger:
“You should find a nice church woman.”
“Someone who wants to settle down.”
“Someone who won’t cheat on you.”
“Someone who could be equally yoked with you.”
“Not these trash bitches you keep catching feelings for.”
Well, it’s not like I forgot she said that.
It’s not like I never wonder if it was sound advice.
Even though I’m pretty sure the most devoted followers of Christ can still be plagued with the temptation to cheat, lie, and cut off a man’s cock in the middle of the night.
But man, sometimes I wonder.
Am I really making my life harder than it should be?
Do I really need to chase this lifestyle?
Am I just not getting the hints?
Could it really be easier for me?
I mean, there is the road less traveled, and then there is taking a spoon, digging your way under the road, missing the forest entirely, and winding up inside a swamp.
“Hi, Shrek!”
Except no one is bringing me waffles, and the layers of me are less like an onion and more like a mixture of Gonzo, Ren Höek, and Cosmo Kramer – on a good day.
Is that the real miracle of life?
Choosing something that might not be the easiest thing, but is still the thing you are choosing?
Maybe it’s something else and I’m just using that as the “point” of this piece.
But anyway.
What I really mean is this:
I’m not choosing the worst outcomes.
No, you can keep those.
I’m attempting the outcomes that resonate with me.
I am not trying to win the easiest life.
I am trying to find the life that feels best around my cock.
No, seriously.
That’s way more romantic than it sounds.
And that is the problem.
Those outcomes are not fantasy.
They are plausible.
Totally.
Things take time, and you can’t know if something is going to work unless you waste a noticeable amount of your life finding out.
I’m sure there is a lot more I would want to say about this subject.
Bigger scars. Smaller thoughts.
But I kinda just want to drink some root beer and watch something instead.
See, the problem is not that I am too old to want it.
The problem is that I am too old to pretend I want something else.
I don’t know.
Maybe I’ve gotten way too old for this shit.
Like 25 years ago.
Companion Track: “Too Old” – Barenaked Ladies
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