Cycle I: Coming on Strong
The Hidden Voice
Record ~ Kawaii · 06 (v1.00)
THE HOUSE OF ZAN — Zan
♡ Yunomi feat. TORIENA — Oedo Controller
OPENING: 自分のスペースがあってもいい？
Attention, universe!
I have an announcement.
I’m perfectly happy with my orbit.
Thank you very much.
Everything is moving along nicely. I have my interests, my routines, and a reasonably good idea of where I’m going.
I know what I like.
I know what I don’t like.
And if something unexpected comes flying toward me, I’d appreciate a little warning.
Preferably in writing.
Three business days in advance!
( •̀ᴗ•́ )و
That should be sufficient.
Of course, I understand that the universe doesn’t revolve around me.
Technically.
But I do have a schedule.
And I’d rather not have it interrupted by some mysterious celestial object that appears out of nowhere and starts changing everything.
How inconsiderate!
Although…
What if it’s an interesting object?
Something I’ve never seen before?
Something bright and peculiar, moving through space in a way I hadn’t imagined?
Well.
I suppose I could have a look.
Just a little look!
|ω･)
I’m not changing course or anything.
I’m simply curious.
Besides, space is enormous!
There’s room for all sorts of wonderful things.
Stars.
Planets.
Strange little objects traveling along strange little paths.
Most of them will never meet.
And that’s perfectly fine.
I don’t think everything in the universe needs to be connected.
Imagine having to introduce yourself to every asteroid.
Hello!
Lovely to meet you!
Please don’t hit me!
⊂(・﹏・⊂)
I’d never get anything done.
But every now and then, an ordinary afternoon becomes considerably more interesting because somebody else is there.
That’s exciting.
It can also be inconvenient.
Because I was doing perfectly well on my own!
Now I’m looking forward to conversations that haven’t happened.
I’m wondering what somebody thinks.
I’ve even started considering an idea I would have dismissed a week ago.
Excuse me?
Who authorized these changes?
I’d like to speak to whoever is responsible.
…
Oh.
I think that might be me.
How embarrassing.
But here’s something I’ve noticed.
People can become remarkably attached to their own direction.
They have their plans, preferences, and carefully arranged little universes.
I happen to be quite fond of mine.
But there’s something peculiar about wanting another person to become important to you while insisting that absolutely nothing should change because of them.
I’d like somebody nearby who enjoys talking to me and introduces me to things I’ve never considered.
But I’d also like everything else to remain exactly as it was.
…
So they can matter to me, provided I don’t have to change anything?
I’d be disappointed if that was all they offered me.
Oh, that’s annoying!
I was enjoying my perfectly reasonable position.
Have you ever heard of an immovable object meeting an unstoppable force?
I think people are rather fond of describing themselves that way.
Nothing can move me!
Nothing can stop me!
Very impressive.
But suppose two people with those attitudes decide they’d like to share something.
One refuses to move.
The other refuses to stop.
And everybody stands around waiting for the universe to explain how that’s supposed to work.
I’d like to see the calculations.
Actually, no.
I’d probably have to do mathematics.
Never mind!
(┐「ε:)
But if neither person is prepared to change anything, what exactly are they expecting to happen?
They could admire each other from a distance.
That might be lovely.
There’s nothing wrong with two people being perfectly happy in their own space.
I rather like having mine.
But getting close enough to share something?
That’s different.
Because another person has a direction, too.
Things they enjoy.
Places they want to go.
Ideas about how their life should work.
And those things won’t always fit neatly around mine.
How inconvenient.
I go to all the trouble of arranging my universe, and somebody else has the audacity to arrive with one of their own.
Honestly!
Although I suppose I’d be rather disappointed if they didn’t.
If they gave up everything that made them interesting just to fit into my plans, who would I be getting to know?
I’d already know what they were going to say.
And I have enough of my own opinions to keep me occupied.
Quite enough, actually.
But there’s another possibility.
What if we liked each other enough to reconsider a few things?
Not everything.
Certainly not the things we genuinely need to remain ourselves.
But perhaps some of those arrangements we’ve become so attached to aren’t quite as important as we thought.
They might introduce me to a song I’d never have chosen on my own.
I could invite them somewhere they’d never thought to go.
Or we might discover something new to both of us.
An adventure!
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ
Oh, I do like those.
Especially when they’re a little unusual.
Something that makes other people look at you and ask why on Earth you’ve decided to do that.
Well…
Perhaps because we wanted to?
I don’t think every worthwhile experience needs to fit somebody else’s idea of what people are supposed to do together.
That sounds terribly restrictive.
Imagine having an entire universe to explore and only being allowed to visit the places everybody already approves of.
How boring!
Of course, I’d want the other person to be excited about our adventure, too.
Not simply following along because I’ve decided it’s a magnificent idea.
Because then I’m the only one enjoying it.
And where’s the fun in that?
I’d rather know they’re curious.
That there’s somewhere they’d genuinely like to go.
And that they feel comfortable suggesting another direction if mine doesn’t appeal to them.
We might disagree.
We might discover that neither of our original ideas was particularly good.
Then we’d have to come up with something else.
Although I suppose there’s a difference between making room for another person and allowing them to move you wherever they please.
Absolutely not!
I have my own direction.
And I wouldn’t appreciate somebody treating everything I’ve built as an inconvenience.
But letting somebody influence me isn’t necessarily the same as letting them decide everything for me.
I can choose to change my mind or rearrange something because I want them there.
I can also say no.
They get to make those choices, too.
Change is easy to recommend when it’s somebody else doing it.
You should try something new!
You should be more flexible!
You should make room for me!
Excellent suggestions.
Now it’s my turn?
…
Oh.
I see.
Apparently, this arrangement involves me, too.
How troublesome.
(￣▽￣*)ゞ
I’d like to see what happens when we both agree to try something unfamiliar.
And I don’t think that happens automatically.
You can’t just find somebody interesting, announce that you’re going to share an orbit, and expect the universe to organize everything for you.
We’d have to find out what it’s actually like to spend time together.
Which differences make things more interesting.
Which ones keep getting in the way.
And whether either of us even wants to change course.
Not every interesting encounter needs to become something larger.
But sometimes…
Somebody becomes important enough that changing direction doesn’t seem like such a terrible idea.
You find yourself excited about an experience you wouldn’t have chosen before.
A place you never expected to visit.
An interest you didn’t know you could share.
And the surprising part isn’t simply that somebody introduced you to something new.
It’s that you genuinely want to be there with them.
Together!
ฅ(≧▽≦)ฅ
…
Oh.
We might try something neither of us would have chosen alone.
That’s a little frightening.
Because changing direction doesn’t guarantee you’ll arrive somewhere wonderful.
We might discover that our ideas don’t fit.
That we want different things.
Or that something we both expected to enjoy isn’t nearly as exciting as we imagined.
I’d probably be disappointed.
I might even complain.
Quite a lot.
But I don’t think the possibility of disappointment means I should refuse every opportunity to be influenced by somebody.
What a terribly predictable universe that would be.
I’d know exactly where I was going.
Exactly what to expect.
And exactly which possibilities I’d never allowed myself to explore.
Hmm.
That doesn’t sound especially exciting.
Which brings me back to my announcement.
Remember?
I was perfectly happy with my orbit.
Everything was arranged.
No unauthorized changes!
Three business days’ notice!
Very official.
Very impressive.
And now I’m considering changing course.
How terribly inconsistent of me.
…
Oh, well.
I suppose being happy where I am doesn’t mean I’m forbidden from discovering somewhere else I’d like to go.
And I don’t have to invite every interesting person along.
Some might be perfectly lovely from a distance.
Others might pass through my life without changing much at all.
But if somebody comes close enough to matter…
And if I matter enough to them…
Perhaps we could see what happens when neither of us insists that everything must remain exactly as it was.
We’d still have our own directions.
We’d have to decide where we both wanted to go.
That sounds like an adventure!
Of course, I still reserve the right to ask questions.
Lots of them.
And if we’re heading somewhere completely ridiculous, I’d appreciate being informed.
Preferably before we arrive.
But I think I’m willing to reconsider my very important announcement.
Because I like having my own space.
And I rather like the thought that somebody else has theirs.
But maybe…
There’s somewhere neither of us has been yet.
And I wouldn’t mind finding out where that is.
ENDING: Can I have my own space?