Lapse In Memory (Jump)… (1-22)

Content note: This piece covers nudes, sexting, privacy, revenge porn, and the ethics of deleting intimate content after relationships end.

Everyone should have the privilege to be remembered for their personal achievements and works.

If you were to get to know me in a non-kink setting, you’d learn that I am a preservationist of art, entertainment, and historical knowledge.

I believe there is cultural significance to these subjects that needs to be uncovered and protected for the betterment of current and future generations.

However, I do not believe that every type of information and media should be kept, viewed, and shared freely.

I have been in a number of connections with people throughout the years. During that time, the sharing of personal information and body parts has been numerous and extensive.

I am a sex-positive person and find enjoyment, even a level of arousal, when someone I enjoy speaking to shares a private photo with me – especially if it was taken solely for me.

The same can be true of “dirty little secrets” or deep, dark fantasies that escape from another’s lips / fingertips into my ear / screen.

I embrace the idea that those who want to send and receive material of a personal nature should be able to do so freely and without it later becoming ammunition – blackmail, revenge porn, “private collection” trophies.

I am not one to keep “receipts” of my interactions with those who are no longer in my life. I believe that once a relationship or brief encounter has ended – even if the individual has not said so explicitly – chats and photos exchanged should be permanently deleted.

Alas, while I do what I can from my side, the majority of technology we use is always mining us for our personal data. Texts, photos, and files we send back and forth are always being stored, at rest, somewhere in between the devices we use every day.

For this reason, when possible, I try to embrace best practices for communication. While this can be inconvenient or not possible at times, I make a casual effort to protect not only myself, but any other person who entrusts me with pieces of themselves.

From an emotional standpoint, it can sometimes be hard to move on from the “souvenirs” one has acquired. They become little keepsakes of past moments in time – held onto intentionally, or by sheer laziness / forgetfulness to delete.

Nevertheless, I believe any person has a right to be forgotten, completely, without fear, retaliation, or regret for oversharing in a moment that has long passed.

Now, while this should often hold true, there are situations where this is not the approach to take – such as abuse, harassment, or harm where evidence is needed to protect oneself and others.

My train of thought here is only about lost love, broken friendships, brief encounters, and the “I was Insert X during that time” versions of ourselves.

We should always be able to freely leap to our next interactions without carrying the weight of frozen memories from a dead one.

Therefore, everyone should have the right to be forgotten for things that no longer matter – and that no longer belong to any other person.

Companion track: “Jump” – Madonna

Common Decency and Respect – RD-8 

Cycle I – Coming on Strong (The Hidden Voice) · 22 (v1.01)

Go Deeper with This Piece

Continue Cycle I

Try Something Else